Last week on #NHBi, like always we had a very interesting topic. ‘S/he can’t cook, so what?’ And our guest this week was Babatunde Rosanwo. An interesting topic because, get this, everybody loves food, with some even proclaiming to be foodies which even takes it a whole step further than just eating for diet or health. It becomes an art in this sense, a lifestyle if you may.
Rosanwo who had 45 minutes to share his opinion on the topic got off by saying that there were women who indeed did not know how to cook, barely knowing their way in and out of the kitchen. Men on the other hand didn’t seem required from time immemorial to have up to date culinary skills. These gender roles being pretty much already defined and largely accepted, there were no arguments, or asides, as to why it should be the role of the woman to cook, which I’m glad on behalf of everyone else that this didn’t happen. Our guest, however points out, the essence is not to marry a wife and then turn her into a cook, because women have their own careers.
And what is the excuse for women who can’t cook really? Rosanwo says this could be from ‘…not being taught at home, to caring so much about their nails.’ Hilarious really, but that’s how serious it gets.
On a personal note, Rosanwo makes it clear that he can’t date or marry a woman who cannot cook, himself being able to since he was 7. And while many people would say ‘don’t discuss cooking, it’s not relevant’ for him ‘to date or marry is a choice, hence its relevance’.
Seeing food doesn’t just have hunger quenching purposes of course the health implications are worth brining up and Rosanwo notes this in that it’s healthier to eat at home(home cooked meals that is, not takeaways) rather than eating about town. He says: ‘These days children’s dietary habits have shifted from healthy foods to fast foods cos cooking at home is a myth’
But of course many women would claim their man do not mind that they can’t cook, Rosanwo says do not be deceived ‘the day Sade gives them some fish stew at work, you are gone’. Fish stew. Hmm. Too pregnant with meaning if you ask me. But so that he isn’t just accused of making mere assumptions, our guest hits his point home with a story from as close as home. His Aunt, elegant top class lady has he called her, got married, didn’t know how to cook, but hey, no worries, there were 3 cooks at her beck and call, and they were on point too. Years down the line, it’s the couple’s wedding anniversary and the cooks, resorting to some sort of conspiracy decide to just pack up and leave. ‘6 hours to dinner time nothing was ready…Aunt just sat in the kitchen crying.’ Her husband’s boss and business partners were supposed to come over for the anniversary dinner. In his words ‘My aunt could not boil eggs, talk more of making dinner for 8 guests on her wedding anniversary… Aunt placed a call to her husband to cancel the dinner at home, they eventually settled for a restaurant in Ikeja. And that happened to be the beginning of nagging experience for husband & wife.’
Maybe because he declared that he has taught 4 women how to cook or because he said he has been cooking since 7 but Fadekemi Agarau, remember her from last week, had done some shopping for Rosanwo already and declared ‘@rosanwo declare your marital status abeg, I get wife for you’. And what did he have to say? ‘Ladies, I can cook but I am taken. I have been offered another level of grace.’ Pretty much settles yea, but then, more than ample proof to the point Rosanwo made when he said ‘I hear it is sexy for a man to cook for his lady, so men go learn how to make things happen in the kitchen and not just the bedroom.’ But on this topic, women were the ones getting the most words, and there was more from Rosanwo ‘Being able to cook gives a lady some leverage & control over certain decisions in a relationship. Go find out’
‘To round up, I won’t date/marry a lady who can’t cook. It’s not a fantasy; I will cook for her cos she can also do same.’ – Babatunde Rosanwo, 2013.
While, Rosanwo tweeted, as expected, the reactions poured in from the get go in a flurry. At the end of the night #NHbi was trending #10 in Nigeria, #1 in Lagos.
@sisi_yemmie: Good cooking is a value you can add to your relationship… Why is this such a big issue lately?
@reminola: I love, love, love cooking for my husband. It gives me joy to take care of him.
@madamedemadame: someone somewhere has prepared efo riro for your husband and you are here forming ‘cooking o matter’
@roldrein: but when I meet the right lady, mehn cooking would be aside ooh…its all about her xracter not her food.
@nnyeka: i cook cos i want to, dont expect me to massage palm kernel 4 banga soup whle u shout up ManU..it cant work
The discussion continued late into midnight, with such passion that no one could have anticipated, and taking on a slightly new head of its own; whether a woman can cook or not, a man would still cheat. Of course the views were diverse and wide but a solid constant that remained was that it is important a woman knows how to cook, not just for her husband, but for herself and her dignity. A woman’s cooking skills is what among many other things, makes her desirable, if it is absent it tells badly on her and the home where she comes from. And let’s say she is still single, awaiting the right man to come for her hand in marriage, perhaps would she not be required to prepare meals for her parents, or would her aged mothers back have to give way in the kitchen. Besides, what do mothers have to pass on to daughters these days, take away the cooking and its almost nothing else, seeing as most girls have rather made the internet, and social media the grounds for learning their own brand of morality and character.
Don’t forget to join us again next week Wednesday, 9pm. It promises to be a wonderful one.
Follow our guest for the week on twitter, Babatunde Rosanwo, @rosanwo and the host of the show Mark Amaza @amasonic.
You can also follow the official handle of the show, @nhbinteractive.
Caleb Olorunmaiye
@_Ceefour
Image credits: http://www.survivingdating.com
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