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Spice Up The Sex – Valentine’s Day Special Edition #NHBi Review S5 W1 by @GinaFatale

Review, , ,

The timing really couldn’t be more perfect. After weeks of postponement, Season 5 of #NHBi finally got to a start on the eve of Valentine’s Day, and we couldn’t have gotten it hotter and more steaming than having @GinaFatale discussing ‘How to Spice Up Your Sex Life.’

Communication, our guest told us is the bedrock to having an awesome sex life.

‘When you communicate with your partner about your sexual desires, limits, fantasies, requests, curiosities, preferences, styles etc, you lay a concrete foundation for an ever evolving and kick ass sex life. That thing that freaked you out yesterday may intrigue u tomorrow; what felt really nice today, might turn out to be too rough and unpleasant tomorrow.
Change is constant, not excluding your sexual preference.’

If you thought all this talk about communication was just textbook material, our guest got down to the nitty gritty with her 10 Tips To Spice Up Your Sex Life.

1. DO IT AS OFTEN AS YOU CAN:
spontaneous sex is good, but not always necessary. Don’t be above making plans & seeing it through

2. Foreplay: not everytime kpa kpa kpa, roll over and snore or throw legs in opposite direction and be doing mhm mhm until it’s over.

Just because u know each other’s body don’t mean u shouldn’t explore it as if it’s the first time. Have single pringle aunty come get d kids. Modulate between luxuriating and passionate urgency, whichever one you choose, bring your A game.

3.Talk Dirty: you really don’t have to get smutty for it to be sexy, 4get what you hear in porn, you’ll end up sounding like a ridiculous pervert.

4. HEAD GAME: it is the season of love, only natural that the head is served as side dish.

Pro tip 1: You don’t always have to stimulate to completion, have fun with it tease, warm , caress, stroke with tongue/hand.
Pro tip 2: Ladies, put your hair in a scrunchie, I don’t know how those porn stars don’t choke on their own hair, be comfortable, it helps.
Pro tip 3: guys, have a pillow beneath her pelvis, it surely is more comfortable for you to give that pleasure.
Pro tip 4: spitting instead of swallowing is NOT a rejection of your partner/ & PLEASE, cumming on the face is not a thing! STOP IT

5. Role Play: You’ve been Mr. X /Mrs X a while now, it’s val, try being a LASTMA official, pepeye or whatever gets u both in the mood.

6.Masturbate for the others pleasure: how else can u can u show your partner how you like it, visual aids are a turn on for everyone.

7. Tell a Story: This goes hand in hand with 6, while partner A is busy with self, help play out that fantasy with a naughty story.

8. Dress Up: Lingerie is for special occasions, valentine et al. it helps too if you are a little too conscious of your body. It helps heighten your libido and don’t sweat it if it gets torn. That’s the whole idea. Throw in a strip tease if you are up for it.

9. Different positions/Locations: Do I really need to explain this part? oh well, I’ll try; I love my bed, its high, comfy, doesn’t squeak, firm, the sheets, so soft, but you hardly remember the do on it unlike d kitchen table, the balcony, the shower stall, aunty’s house, friend’s lawn and the entire creative places you two can find.

10. INVEST IN SEX TOYS: I’m talking cock rings, vibrators, cuffs, blindfolds, ticklers, sex games, sex vouchers, arousal gels etc

Our guest really had quite a curtain raiser of a show for the new season. And her tips just had everyone favoriting and retweeting away.

If you thought this was an enlightening episode, join us again as we return to our regular programming from next week, Wednesday at 9pm Nigerian time.

 

“Why Should My Body Count Matter To My Man?” by @Sugabelly #NHBi Review S5W3

Review, , ,

If last week on the show was amazing, we decided to turn it up a notch with the rebuttal from a female perspective on the discussion from last week. And who else could we have had than the candid and very opinionated @Sugabelly talking on the topic ‘Why Should my body count matter to my man?’

Our guest was quick to get the ground running and took no prisoners in classic No Holds Barred style.

‘So far, I’ve fucked thirteen men. This apparently, is my “body count”. To some men, this is an intolerably high number of foreign penises that automatically disqualifies me as “wifey” material. To me, all it really means is that I like sex. And I’m not alone. We didn’t get to seven billion people without a whole lot of fucking. Men want to have sex with as many women as they like, but also want the women they love to remain virginal and pure in their eyes. This association of sex and filth is problematic as fuck. The very idea that women are somehow “tainted” by other men is bullshit. This idea is the core of Patriarchy – a system set up to liberate men from moral responsibility by placing all the burden on women. By transferring all the religious and social guilt about sexual chastity to women, men free themselves to indulge their sexual urges. And assuage their collective conscience of guilt by policing the sexual behaviour of women. Pussy is not a commodity. Too many men act like they are buying fruit at a market, and if it gets touched too many times, it goes bad. How disturbed a man is by your body count is directly proportional to how insecure he is that you know his sexual prowess ain’t shit. Especially wack men like virgins because they have no frame of reference. There’s no good or bad sex because she doesn’t know any better. Your girl is a virgin, so your dick game becomes the Matrix Nothing there but when you’re inside what do you see? Bomb sex everywhere. IMHO More women should care about their man’s body count. This is the far more important figure. If you men are getting in so much practice fucking all your “hoes”, how come so many women are still enduring bad sex? Men who have fucked half the block and still can’t make you cum aren’t worth the effort it takes to drop your panties. Sometimes it’s about power. A childish urge to possess something no one else has possessed, or that as few people as possible possess. Some men tie a woman’s sexuality to the prospect of their future children. Men feel somehow, that sexual experimentation and motherhood are incompatible. A whore cannot be a mother. A mother must be a saint. No one wants to think about their mother sucking dick. This is why the commonest barbs used to police women’s sexual freedoms often
remind them to think of their future role as mothers. Then there’s also the genetic impulse to avoid disease. A hundred years ago, many sexually transmitted disease were incurable. Because many STDs also affect a developing fetus either during pregnancy or birth a woman’s chance of having STDs became a huge factor. Ergo, it was women who carried the true risk of contaminating one’s innocent future offspring with the consequences of her sluttiness…Rather than worrying about how many guys have eaten your girl out, worry about whether or not she’s a sociopath.
If your girl is “loose” it’s not because she fucks a lot. Vaginas were designed to hold a ten pound baby. Your microdick is not her fault”

Sugabelly dropped it and dropped it like it was sizzling hot. And there is no gainsaying the fact that she did raise valid points. In the eternal battle between the sexes, how long are we going to remain hypocritical, can’t we just agree what is good for the goose is good for the gander? Women don’t have sex with themselves. It takes two to tango. For every body count a woman racks, it counts two on the side of her partner. The men folk are know to be the most outgoing sexually, women are generally more conservative, waiting to be wooed and seduced by the woman. And isn’t it often said that men are polygamous in nature? So if men can go about looking for the next body to conquer, why do women have to take the whack for an attitude and pattern that has been enforced for generations? The debate wouldn’t end here. In sitting rooms and bars, and in quite corners in a house party, its a discussion that is bound to rage on.

There is right and wrong. And there is what society accepts, and what it has openly rejected. But what society has accepted doesn’t always mean what is necessarily in the right. And the true path of development is in talking about these things and constantly evolving attitudes and thought process to the point where we reach the zenith of social development as a people.

Here are some of the comments sent in from participants during the show. Don’t forget to join us again for another exciting episode. Have a blessed week.

Are You the Real Chic or Side Chic? by @Perxian_Pride #NHBiReview S4W5

Review, Uncategorized, , ,

Drum rolls. Fireworks. Applause. Welcome guys to yet another exciting review of everyone’s favourite Twitter show, #NHBi.

Last week on the show we talked about how weddings and expenses with the topic ‘Must our Wedding cost a Fortune?’ Well, before you get to that finish line where the ring actually gets put on your finger, many ladies have to contend with whether or not they are being taken seriously in a relationship. Am I the only one? Am I the first one with a pack of others after me? Am I the fallback option? Am I the latest inductee into his harem?

A girl can hardly ever tell exactly what her position in a mans life is. What you see is what you get.

And just as someone suggested right before the show some girls were set to get their side chic badge today.

This week on the show, we had @Perxian_Pride talking on the topic ‘Are you the side chic, or the real chic?’

Our guest asks, ‘Ladies, have you ever had that sick feeling in your relationship that maybe you aren’t the only one in his life? God knows I have.’

Popular opinion defines the side chic as the girl who is the second, or fall back option for a man. He wants to hang out he calls ‘X’. But she has to work or isn’t feeling too well, then he calls ‘Y’. Note that ‘Y’ wasn’t his first option to go with him to that dinner reception for his boss. Now he wants to have sex, he calls ‘X’, she’s on her period, hell, so he calls ‘Y’. What ‘Y’ is, is a substitute. An option when ‘X’ isn’t available.

But Y of course doesn’t know that she is indeed a substitute. How can she tell he hadn’t asked 3 other girls out to the dance with him before he found her available and willing. Its not like in a game of football where you can clearly tell someone is starting ahead of you, and you’ll only play if he is injured, not match fit or suspended.

But then, as long as one isn’t entirely stupid, sometimes you can clearly read the signs and know you aren’t the only one. Our guest then says that:

‘A side chic may choose to play her role quietly because it’s hurtful when she finds out she’s the side piece
and not where his heart lies. Contrary to what some men think, side chics can maintain their own and they pride in themselves. Some are actually proud to be one.’

The MAIN CHIC – these are the ones that have the guy’s heart. They are the ones too caught up in the idea of being the best.’

The mistake they make is assuming because they have more access to the guy, his house, his family, his friends, it automatically makes them the main chic. You are still being cheated on. Perhaps your being the ‘main chic’ is solely because you are more presentable than the side chic. Or the relationship with the side chic is one that would be objected to on religious, or ethnic grounds from perhaps the family. If you were all he ever needed and more, you would not be cheated on.

Our guests however advices side chics, assuming you already know your status, not to nag, be too clingy nor exhibit jealousy, leaving the main chic to struggle with those and inevitably irritate him enough to drop her and then whoop whoop, there is your promotion.

The tweets poured in and it was a blast from the get go. Some of the interesting comments are presented after the cut.

 

 

Don’t forget to join us again next week for another interesting episode. Follow the hashtag #NHBi to join in and send in your comments using the hashtag. The conversation continues all week, never stops. Have a wonderful week. God bless.

How to End Relationships #NHBiReview S3 W11

Review,

Some people, I can’t mention names now, but there were indeed some people who were on the verge of a mini heart attack when at about 9.30pm our host Mark Amaza, @amasonic, announced that we would not be having our regular tweetshow, that’s the word in vogue now, but rather some sort of feedback session owing to technical glitches. Someone was hyperventilating beside me when our guest for the night Uncle Efe @HL_Blue stumbled on stage, muttering something inaudible and thanking the host profusely in the process. What an entrance.

Welcome to our review of this week’s show on #NHBi. Our stage stumbling guest, Uncle Efe, was speaking on ‘How to End relationships.’ There are a thousand and one ways to end relationships of course, but I suppose here on #NHBi we wouldn’t be considering an Oscar Pistorious style, because yes indeed, that is one way to end relationships. But talking about healthy means to cut it off, without having bad blood and bitterness and anger in its aftermath, what are the options really? As much variety as we have in pick up lines, I suppose there are as many in break up lines. I mean, there are the classics ‘Its not you, its me, you deserve someone much more better than I.’ And then the spiritual, ‘My pastor said…’ You can take it up from there, can’t you? Then how about making your parents or the other persons tribe the scapegoat; ‘Baby you know how my parents feel about Ibo guys, let’s just end it now before it is too late.’ Humans are wired for survival, and when a relationship begins to choke you, you get all sorts of creative in devising a mechanism, or just the words to end it.

The important thing about ending a relationship is that to do so effectively, you must have been in control of the relationship. Our guest makes this point clear enough when he likens breaking up in a relationship to driving a car in a journey. When you are tired and want out, you simply just pull over, turn off the ignition, un buckle your seat belt and simply walk away. Compare it to if you are in the passenger it and you aren’t in control. You want to get off, and the driver isn’t going to let you off easy, hell he could run you into a tree trunk.

‘If you are the driver in the relationship your own is good. Just turn off the engine and come down. Or you can just travel for your masters. Be like, Jesus take the wheel of this relationship and jump out like that.’ He continues ‘However, many of you are not in the drivers seat of your relationship that is why you are asking how to end them.’

Then, there was one of those affirmative self help things councillors and public speaking people do that Uncle Efe asked us to do. Me I was tired, but hey, I didn’t want to be the guy who everyone refers to as the sceptic who don’t think these things work. So when he asked us to put our right hand on our chest, I promptly did and we repeated after him ‘I will not be the passenger in my relationship.’ Breath deep. You see, that was helpful.

And then, we had to talk about our relationships, the ones we want to end but don’t know how, Uncle Efe was here to give us advise. And advise he gave. Check out this one: ‘There is this lovely way of ending a relationship. Just call the other person and say, call me back, anytime credit finishes we’re over.’ Ouch!

‘Or you tear your dresses into pieces and tell him if you can repair this dress then you can repair our relationship.’ And he warns, there are no wrong methods of breaking up.

And then we had to share our worst break-up story. This really got me emo and all, *sniffs*, I remember I left, then came back, but couldn’t really take it anymore I just had to leave again.

Relationships are difficult to end. And while you are pondering how to end it, maybe for lack of courage or lack of words, remember how you suffered the same way when you were going to approach her in the first place. However much disdain you harbour for this person right now though, it is important to treat people with respect, I mean that is what you would want yourself isn’t it. That way it is easier for the other person to move on, at least that is one thing you would really want. It is also nice to know why it didn’t work, it could help the other person improve on themselves or their next relationships.

Here are select tweets from the discussion this week, not enough space to put as many as we would liked, too much hilarious stuff, and real talk. The combo is what makes it real fun.

@Omojuwa: You don’t have to break up, just walk away. By the time you are back someone else will be going through that door anyway.

@suave_sultan: Another break up story I heard, niccur just yelled another girls name as he was ejaculating. She never came back.

@tayoboy: Got her to find weed in my pockets. Never even smoked cigarettes. She thought she did the dumping. Every one is happy

@topeatiba: some people are experts at working you up till you leave. Kinda like bosses that would rather not sack you

@rosanwo: Guy: Babe, I cheated on you, I know you will leave me, sorry. Babe: So, I forgive you. Guy: No, I can’t forgive myself, its over.

@iAmKingsiju: Break-ups are the tough part of a relationship, if you have to do it be firm and nice.

@STONEHENGENG: Put Barry White’s ‘Kiss and say goodbye’ when she is around. Lol

@OmowonuolaMaja: Sha bring scotch, ice cream and cake with chocolate when you are coming to break up with me. At least there is something to binge on.

@HRHTega1: Must we break up? Can’t we just fizzle out like candle wey don finish. No need for senrere

Caleb Olorunmaiye

Should Single Women Hide their Money? #NHBiReview S3 W9

Review, , ,

single woman hiding money

Or maybe we should put it this way, ‘Should Wealthy Single Women Downplay Their Wealth’?  At least that is what our guest @ebonyoma seems to think, saying that the topic at first glance may seem as if we are talking about being stingy.

Welcome guys to another review of yet another wonderful edition of #NHBi. So, should single women, no matter how much they have, hide their money? Should they play it down so that they do not intimidate men or scare off prospective suitors? Whatever it is your viewpoint is or was, #NHBi gets to usually solidify it, or provide some other perspective that informs and educates and when received with an open mind improves on what it is that you stand for.

Oma says “For years, a lot of us women have heard stuff like ‘don’t display your money o. don’t buy car o. So that you don’t intimidate men’”. And she says advice to a single woman not to do things such as renting her own apartment, or buying a car, comes from all sort of places, friends, colleagues, family and even pastors. She asks ‘As a single woman with a source of income or inheritance or both, why shouldn’t I live how I please?  If I can afford a car why shouldn’t I buy one for myself, or why should I buy a rickety one? If I can afford to dine in expensive restaurants or take myself on holidays, why shouldn’t I?”

Or more controversially, if I can afford a cook or a housekeeper, why shouldn’t I get one? Because I’m unmarried?” The advice against such to a single woman no matter how well meaning, she says, has never made sense to her. ‘It is the same as telling a woman to act dumb or pretend not to know something so as not to intimidate a man.’

She says it’s not about competing with men but about working hard and getting what you want on yourself. In her opinion, the only reason why a woman might need to downplay her wealth is to avoid gold diggers?

Suddenly the conversation veered to a lane no one even envisaged. Gold diggers. Male gold diggers. Who knew? Oma says, ‘For years the word golddigger has been attached to solely women. From the stereotypical dumb blonde who marries a very old, wealthy man to a girl innocently asking a guy how much he earns.’ She continues ‘But tonigt, ladies and gentlemen, especially ladies, I am happy to inform you that there are MALE golddiggers.’

Pause. Shock. Gasps.  Feet shuffling. A few men take their leave. Women break into a spirited series of claps and boos. I just bowed my head. ‘They are increasing in number, especially in Abuja.’ Gobe! More men take their leave. We should have put security at the door.

‘These men are everywhere. From nightclubs to offices to banks and even churches!’ What do miners have to fear in the presence of God? Oma goes on to give signs on how ladies can recognise these golddiggers. Wasn’t surprised to see women bringing out their writing pads.

  1. They are smooth talkers. Whoosh. The quintessential male gold diggers and the Casanova have that in common.
  2. They lie a lot.
  3. They never appear to be broke or poor. They put up the appearance of big boys with big ‘projects’ so that when they start asking you for money, you won’t be suspicious.

Who are their preys? ‘Rich, single women. Mostly in their thirties and older because they are emotionally vulnerable. Women who are desperate to settle down because of loneliness or family pressure.’ And she closes thus ‘But despite all these, should a single, wealthy woman hide her wealth? Or deny herself pleasures she can afford? No. I do not think so. You can buy that car? Please do. You can afford that vacation? Please go. Life is for the living. What is the point in working so hard if you cannot enjoy the fruits of your labour?’

By the time our guest Oma was done, the Abuja boys where nowhere to be found. And there were all these subs flying from perhaps women who had had first hand experiences of these golddiggers.

But in all of these, my take is that if you have money, spend it on what you want to, but be careful on , the kind of guys you attract and secondly, that your money doesn’t  get you arrogant and proud. These pitfalls are necessary to avoid because when they aren’t it becomes a lose-lose situation for you.

 

@onaives: Where I come from a man is not permitted to receive any form of money from a woman regardless of her financial status

@aarsheedah: As a lady, from your father’s house straight to husband’s house. Living alone makes no sense

@wildeyeq: Even chicks wey no get copper dey fear Gold-digger. We see una

@oyinkolawa: That was how one told me to give him 500k that he was going to ad 1M and get me a car. I told him to try another trick.

@afobajee: some tweeps be taking this gold digger thing personal. Victims maybe?

@DABRAINIAC: Women are always having to downplay themselves to soothe the egos of men and society and that in my opinion is an insult to both men and women

@miss_nelo: Ladies spend your money but please stay humble. Spending your money is different from flaunting it.

@Emveepee_1: I know of a lady who is no longer driving her Honda because she is looking for a man to marry. Advice from family. She moves about on bike.

@miss_nelo: Be rest assured that if you downplay your wealth to get a man, you will compromise on a lot of things after marriage. Career, your future, your goals…

@OreFakorede: Stay alert. A man who keeps coming to you with bills is not really a man, he is a leech…and he will suck you dry.

So it seems this week’s edition of #NHBi did a lot of damage to the hustle of Abuja boys. They have promised us a robust reply. We wait patiently. Until then and till next week, God bless.

Caleb Olorunmaiye.

#NHBiReview Must He Spend Before I Say Yes? S3W6

Review,

When our host Mark Amaza, @amasonic announced the guest and topic for this week’s discussion of the show, Tony Atambi, @TonyAtambi predicted a ‘full scale war…will last 3 days’.

Welcome guys to another round up of yet another entertaining week on #NHBi. Our guest this week was the delectable Tolulope ‘Tols’ Akinsola @yelecapri10, and the topic was ‘Must He spend before I say yes?’

In true #NHBi spirit, it was fireworks from the get go. Our guest started by saying, if she were asked, her answer would be ‘No’. Her reasons? Well she says ‘I like to know that I wasn’t ‘bought’ into a relationship’. Pretty much straightforward I must say. She told the story of a ‘brother’ who was knocking down her door, asking her to date him. Her mother liked him, and so did her sisters who thought he was intelligent. For most guys it’s usually easy street from here on, our ‘brother’ figured he’d sweeten the deal further and threw in gifts of gold bracelet.

She refused it. A wristwatch came thereafter, same thing, turned down. She says she liked him, but the gifts were making her feel like she was being bribed and her answer depended on the gifts. Long story short, she never dated him and that particular incidence modeled her dating philosophy, for her, you don’t have to spend before she says yes to you. She asks, ‘What happens when he stops spending? Will you undo your yes?’

‘Money shouldn’t define your relationship. If it does it would be the only thing that matters through it.’ She adds.

By this time the sparks were flying already and everyone tuned in had an opinion on the topic.

And whether the shots were subliminals or fired directly, there was plenty of truth in a lot that was said and of course there was a good dose of the hilarious.

From this writer’s point of view, it seems almost natural for a man to spend for the woman in the process of wooing. Women on some primal level are a tad materialistic and are wired to measure how well a man would look after her and her foals, by how he spends during the wooing process. The money or the gifts may not be the main attraction but when it comes down to it, is he a spender or a thriftier? Is he a giver or a taker? Women would expect gifts from you, not because their love is for sale or it depends on it, but to some extent a man who showers gifts in the wooing process exhibits some form of charm and suave which is what they expect to see from a man they consider worth having them. But again depends on what the man is buying. A bottle of groundnut is one thing, a romantic calligraphy written love letter is another.

Many women would still say yes to a frugal man, but at least they entered into the relationship knowing what sort of man he is and knowing what to expect and what not to.

Must he spend before I say yes? Every woman’s expectations are different and so are their standards. But it’s important for men not to use the money bait as a deal maker for women.

There is the kind of woman that you attract when money is the sole form of attraction. Some men are shy and timid; suffer from inferiority complex, perhaps because of a lack of say university education, and having come upon some money throw it endlessly at women with no chill whatsoever. For every kind of women you want, a different kind of bait s necessary.

You wouldn’t want to use money as bait for a woman you expect to be loyal and faithful, what happens when you run out of some and can’t keep up with the lifestyle you have gotten her used to?

When a man spends, the intent is to say loud and clear ‘I will take care of you’. It says ‘I just want you to know, if it ever comes down to it, while you are with me, some things will be well within reach.’ What he spends on shows how much he has, or how he thinks. For example, 200 level boy asking 100 level girl out, he buys her a phone casing. ‘Hey I noticed your phone casing is pretty much worn out, I figured I’ll just get you a new one that would make it look a lot nicer.’

What does this prove? He notices the little things. And isn’t it the little things that they say are the most important. A phone casing won’t necessarily make the girl say yes. But it makes more sense than buying her a gold necklace instead.

The way and manner a man spends on a girl he is asking to date him should be handled delicately. Some things at that point are absolutely not your responsibility. If you throw money carelessly, you’ll become a maga!

Cue in theme music of the day One Naira – M.I Ft Waje

#NHBi was the 1st ranked trend in Nigeria well into the early hours of the next morning. Here are selected tweets from the discussion. Enjoy. See you next week. God bless

@nykelodeon: Love language for Nigerian babes is MONEY! Simple

@RoyalAmebo: Well, I think we should be realistic. I’m a lady. Truly, money can’t buy love but it would boost the ‘cgpa’

@StNaija: Different women have different love languages. Pouring gifts on a service-loving woman is a waste.

@segelegend: A bit of everything is needful in wooing her, money being an integral part

@madamedemadame: Must money be the answer? Must you place the whole load of finance on your boyfriend? Una no get papa?

@KoloKennethK: To all the girls collecting and letting the guys linger, there is a special line for you on judgment day

@nisots: If I do like him and I know I can date him he doesn’t need money or gifts to get a yes. If I like you I like you, if I don’t I don’t.

@baybeekween: in the end with all your spending if a girl doesn’t love you, you are just another Good Samaritan

Caleb Olorunmaiye (@_ceefour)